With all the other news today, you may have missed that the California Supreme Court upheld Proposition 8 – the statewide amendment that invalidated marriage equality in the state – but upheld the validity of marriages performed between the court decision and the vote.
Ok…. so if you live in Alabama, you'd at least be thankful that they upheld SOMETHING. If you're in California, you're probaby pretty ticked.
If you write for the Weekly Standard, you're unhinged. Sam Schulman (can he possibly be a nice Jewish boy??):
The entity known as “gay marriage” only aspires to replicate a very limited, very modern, and very culture-bound version of marriage. Gay advocates have chosen wisely in this. They are replicating what we might call the “romantic marriage,” a kind of marriage that is chosen, determined, and defined by the couple that enters into it. Romantic marriage is now dominant in the West and is becoming slightly more frequent in other parts of the world. But it is a luxury and even here has only existed (except among a few elites) for a couple of centuries–and in only a few countries. The fact is that marriage is part of a much larger institution, which defines the particular shape and character of marriage: the kinship system.
Those darn gays and lesbians! They're interested in falling in love! How worthless a concept is that? oh my…. read on kids….
…marriage is concerned above all with female sexuality. The very existence of kinship depends on the protection of females from rape, degradation, and concubinage. This is why marriage between men and women has been necessary in virtually every society ever known. Marriage, whatever its particular manifestation in a particular culture or epoch, is essentially about who may and who may not have sexual access to a woman when she becomes an adult, and is also about how her adulthood–and sexual accessibility–is defined.
This most profound aspect of marriage–protecting and controlling the sexuality of the child-bearing sex–is its only true reason for being, and it has no equivalent in same-sex marriage. Virginity until marriage, arranged marriages, the special status of the sexuality of one partner but not the other (and her protection from the other sex)–these motivating forces for marriage do not apply to same-sex lovers.
Now to live in such a system, in which sexual intercourse can be illicit, is a great nuisance. Many of us feel that licit sexuality loses, moreover, a bit of its oomph. Gay lovers live merrily free of this system. Can we imagine Frank's family and friends warning him that “If Joe were serious, he would put a ring on your finger”? Do we ask Vera to stop stringing Sally along?
But without social disapproval of unmarried sex–what kind of madman would seek marriage?
So that's why my wonderful husband tied the knot. If it's not dirty and forbidden, it's not fun….
I have to ask at this point. Is this guy married? Will he still be married once this essay becomes widely read?
Don't throw up yet. He's not done!
Even in modern romantic marriages, a groom becomes the hunting or business partner of his father-in-law and a member of his clubs; a bride becomes an ally of her mother-in-law in controlling her husband.
marriage is a part of the kinship system, and kinship depends on the protection, organization, and often the exploitation of female sexuality vis-à-vis males.
Few men would ever bother to enter into a romantic heterosexual marriage–much less three, as I have done–were it not for the iron grip of necessity that falls upon us when we are unwise enough to fall in love with a woman other than our mom. There would be very few flowerings of domestic ecstasy were it not for the granite underpinnings of marriage
granite underpinnings of marriage? Do you suppose he wonders that he's been married not once, twice, but three times?
What the hell is this guy's problem? Daddycat and I have been married for 17 years. It's never seemed to me to be a lead weight around my neck. But hey, guess maybe I'm just a substitute for his mother?
Sam, please, get some therapy. SOON.
Holy Cow. This kind of “opposition” to marriage equality says a whole lot more about a certain subset of men than it does about caring adults who want to enter into a committed relationship that's sanctioned by laws, society, and culture, doesn't it?
If Sam is the only alternative, I have to say that lesbians start to look pretty darn attractive.
NOTE: This essay was so nutty that at first I was convinced that the Weekly Standard got punked. Nobody serious could possibly be this crazy. But no… Sam Schulman, publisher of the now defunct magazine Wigwag, years ago set out to make conservatism hip.
Memo to Sam… this isn't the best strategy. Keep trying, boychik… And damn… quit with the mother thing. That's really creepy…